Bernie Sanders And Tom Hardy In Shuttle Detour To An Unknown Planet
Bernie Sanders and Tom Hardy are stuck in Shuttle Detour to an Unknown Planet and forced to have a deep conversation.
Bernie: Look, Tom, this whole shuttle situation is rigged! Just like the economy back on Earth, the rich planets get all the resources, and we're stuck with this rusty bucket headed to who-knows-where.
Tom: (Gruffly) Right, Bernie. Feels like a proper bleedin' trap, innit? Like being stuck in Bronson all over again, only with more stars.
Bernie: We need to redistribute the oxygen! Why should the elite space travelers get all the good air while we're choking on recycled methane? It's morally reprehensible!
Tom: (Eyes narrowed) Methane, eh? Gives a man a certain… edge. But fair's fair. Everyone deserves a lungful.
Bernie: This isn't just about air, Tom. It's about a system that consistently fails the working class, whether it's on Earth or in the Andromeda Galaxy!
Tom: System's always been a bastard, Bernie. Always trying to keep a good man down. Gotta fight the current, yeah?
Bernie: We need a political revolution, even in space! A democratic socialist utopia where everyone gets a fair shot at life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness!
Tom: Utopia, eh? Sounds like a right proper scrap. Blood, sweat, and maybe a few tears. But worth it, yeah?
Bernie: It's about standing up for what's right, Tom. Even if we're facing down an unknown planet and a potentially hostile alien civilization!
Tom: (A grim smile) Right, Bernie. Let's give 'em a proper welcome. Show 'em what happens when you mess with a couple of blokes who've had enough.